About

While other blogs express their desire to constructively contribute to the game, I, on the other hand, scoff at such niceties.

I waste many hours of my time, entertaining myself--via cursing at strangers on the internets or bragging about how much more I know about baseball than everyone else.

With regards to baseball, I don't care who you are or how long you have been a fan, I am better than you. I know this because, the conversations I overhear at "The Jake", while people crowd around me en mass, make me incredibly smart.

While reading this blog, make sure to respect my decisions, while limiting the level of stupidity that you may demonstrate elsewhere. Furthermore, bad mouthing my team at this blog is illegal. Punishment is: I track you down and kick you down a random flight of stairs.

Which reminds me, if you are a White Sox fan, you are not welcome here. "The Statue" thinks being a White Sox fan is equal to eating sunflower seeds with no teeth-- generally, a bad idea.

Finally, I will refer to myself as "The Statue" only in good times, when the tribe continue to add to the win column. Should we somehow destroy ourselves, I will talk to the unwashed (White Sox fans) directly.

Oh, by the way, at times I might bring in "guest bloggers". Pay is equal to the ancient Egyptian minimum wage. If you are interested in this position, please email me at my earliest convenience.